what makes home, home?

I was inspried by a blog Josie wrote about roots, an where you come from...the only place I feel sure about coming from is my mum an dad's very special wish that they made once happily married an when they reeeeally reeeaaaly loved each other...i was born here

In Billinge Hospital...which is Billinge, Wigan, but for some reason my birth certificate says Merseyside...which is a slightly unfortunate mishap for me...but hey ho I was a bad mother an bore my eldest in Bolton...but thats another story...anyway when i was born the midwifes (in my mums words) were ''fecking witches) and looked like this

infact i think the one in the middle was my midwife for my very very 1st pregnancy (which again is another story).....Anyway thats where I was borned an then i resided for the next 6 months at number 221 Firs lane leigh....Where for reasons I have not yet been told my dad decided to become a Copper miner in SA an so I spent the next 18 months living in a mining settlement village in Johannesburg, Now I have memories from living here...My older brother Pauls 6th birthday where hornets swarmed the part an we sat inside watching them bat against the patio door mesh...my mum said they were lonely times as my dad worked long hours an all we could afford to eat was cheese an onion homemade pastys (which was cruel cause im lactose intollerant) so why they went I do not know....but then we moved here which is where I class as ''home'' if there is such a thing

I lived here till I was 10 and this is where I class as home....Im not australian by birth but then again who is these days...any white Aussie is prigionated from pikey an scouse theives sent over to do pennence...but were full citiens an so if i ever decide to go back i dont have to buy a ticket on the door...And I do have aussie family....

I have never felt at home in england, I find the way of life here so grim....you work to live here an everyone seems to hate everything....theres no tollerance (hahah coming from an honorary aussie thats an insult an a half) and well come on the weathers shite!!.....but then again heres where I have settled and its the 1st place I have actually stayed in one country never mind one place...(my mum didnt just want new houses she wanted new continents)..Whats left of my English family live here...and well teh weather might be shite but it suts my skin...

But thats just my direct heratage...my Dads from stockport an my Grandads dad was german...My mums family are all irish descendents who were shipped over to aus for being theives :) happy times hahah...(her face when her family tree search came up with this was priceless....so Im from all over...an have been all over...one day i will find out where home is but I dont think its Platt-Vegas!!.....I might actually ask my mum to look at her family tree findings...you never know with the self confessed ''im a princess'' bravado i have maybe ill find some long lost king left us billions of gold dubloons...oooo or even better that I came from a rascallian band of pirates :) 

I think what makes home home for me is where the peopel I love are...and one day I will convince them that australia is the way to go....an on that day I wont even have to buy a ticket on the door thanks to my mum an dads need to not get thrown out an taking of the citizanship  :)

Oh an everyone seems to think In a past life i was from Yorkshire (specifically sheffield) as apparantly thats where my accents from even tho ive never been an know noone from the area....

Love an Romance...does it even exist anymore???

Why Michelle what a cynical an depressing subject matter you have chosen there...Well yes, yes it is but the subject matter I was thinking of wroting about got washed down the drain in one simple flush of the pan....

My Husband is lovelly, he's gorgeous an funny an makes me smile...he ''gets'' me as they say....(by get I mean doesnt ring the priory or the men in white coats when I express my more ''arctstic'' veiws on the world) but theres just one thing that really gets me sad an upset...he just doesn't get romance...or how to deal with a  long distance relationship!...(ok so 30 miles isnt that far but its not a distance where we can pop round for a brew an a hug when things are blue)  The fact of the matter is that he is full of what I liek to call BOY PROMISES!!....which are technically promises made with the best of intentions but which are never carried out at the end of the day....esp if the footballs on...

This led me to think is anyone actually romantic anymore...? I see countless Fb status' from women wishing their fellas would just come home with a bunch of flowers...or have a bath ready for them when they finish work...send a nice text in the day...just basically let them know theyre appreciated...in this day an age of the Metrosexual ''in touch with his feminine side'' male you would think that they would every so often make the effort to take 2 minnutes out their day to send a text or write a post it note with nice words on...I know alot of women (me included) who always do little gestures and declarations of romance...with men it seems to have died out...but if its not thought of as less manly to spend an hour doing hair an using tinted moisturiser of a morning why is it ess manly to let your lady know you love her???.................society is just rubbish

Gone are the days of men opening doors an pulling out chairs and putting their ladies coat on when they go anywere....the days of bring flowers and wine home...unless theyre sucking up!!!.....I mean most of that garbage I thinks abit cheesy but liek i say a text or a quick moment out their day to say theyre thinking of you wouldnt go amis would it....

Its more you should just know your fella loves you if he hasnt letched at tits that day or if he lets you watch Hollyoaks....I myself want wining an dining and candles an romance!!!!!!!....

Im a fair cheep person to romance...I have hayfever and cant eat dairy so flowers an chocs are a no no..but I moonpig my fella little notecards every now an then when we aint going to get any time together for a week or so just to let him know im thinking of him...(ok fair do's its usually an expletive on teh front seeing as that new pidgeon site lets you upload ANY pic you want onto the front of a card. :) Happy Days!!) but he loves getting my little love tokens...so why does it not register in his head that if he likes it then I would too!!!......

i blame Labour...cause well everything that goes wrong is their fault isnt it? thats what the Daily Sun told me....

Romannce seems to have shifted over to be the job of the woman...or else it just seems to not exist at all....and the new metrosexual man seems too wrapped up in not appearing to be soft an soppy that Boy Promises seem to have become the norm these days

So whats a girl to do? I knwo what I'm going to do...save all the money Id spend letting mark knw he's the center of my world and buy these!!!

Oh an look £15 quid off!!! 

Shop Savvyness and Guilt free spending....

Ooo 1stly I have to say I am impressed with the typewriter font :) makes me feel all retro..like i should be typing in a NY window with a smoking stick thing an french manicured nails...

Well I am today mostly proud of the fact I have managed to not only go out an find the thing I wanted to find but managed to also find loads of other bargains along the way...the hubby is going to be WOWed by me on Sat night an if he's not well....lets just say he will be talking falsetto for some time to come...

I was drawn to Republic after I saw my frinds Fb pic wearing this Miso dress and decided that I wanted...no no NEEDED....one...eps after she told me they did them in cream!!!! But alas Wigans one of those places where they only have a few of each dress in an all in a size 6...which I have never aspired to be...Im boney enough as it is!!! Anyway i walked into bank an seen this baby!!!

is that not just the LUSHEST thing you've ever seen??...Im in love an wowed!! Plus I look like a Grecian Angel in it :) all i need is some shoes...its gotta be Irregular choice all the way but can I justify spending £75 on shoes when the country is in turmoil an poverty cause of the tory wankers regeme???....although they do say if you love something an it feels right go for it with all your heart and I must say I lost my heart to these courtisan shoes a good year ago.....

 Can you see why I lust after them so? Cant really argue if they have 1 pair left in my size an they look all lonely....*whistles*


I never really used to be a girly girl..I never actually gave a shit about how i looked...by 25 I was the single mother of 2 kids and George at Asda clothes were a luxury..but recently I have learned how to ''Spend a little an live a lot'' an through that godforsaken place I have aquired anough money to up myself from hand me down Asda clothes to the likes of High street couture :) and Topshop dresses for special occasions...



Anyway yeah I've developed a taste for the finer things in life...I bling myself up with faux pearls and jingly jingles that make it sound like Santas coming every time I shift my left hand...I have a loyal love affair with Urban Decay cosmetics an own every giftset that they do [part from the book of shadows Alice In Wonderland edition ((hint hint))] and my bathroom is rammed packed with Soap & Glory products (which I WILL be dedicating a FULL blog too one day as I cant egt enough of the stuff!!!) an it smells like the Lush shop on St Annes in Manc...but all that aside I was trying to justify buying those shoes wasn't I?? although technically I have saved £196 today on the reductions I got at BANK an Topshop (the novelty of being able to link in websites has worn off now) so that means I could TECHNICALLY buy 2 pairs (one in the green ;) and one cream) and break even if I'd had paid full price for the clothes an Jewels....


Technically...now thats one of my favorite words that is...along with Hypothetically...(which is a word I cannot say nor spell)

The effects of half-term on the sane parental mind

I have only just been reminded of having a blog whilst staring blankly and lifeless at my facebook feed, a tiny droplet of drool hanging off my chin since I lost the ability to remember Im a human....School Holidays!! what are they all about??? I'm totally sure I have just had the childdren at home for a good 8 weeks? that was only 2 paydays ago so why are they off again??

I suppose the poor teachers need a break? Esp In Platt-Vegas...jeeeez it's bad enough to want to be  a teacher ( I have never understood how someone intelligant enough to qualify for a teaching position would chose it as a career!) but to have to teach the webbed toe'd individuals that I often see scouring the disgarded chip wrappers on the floor for tea and warming their hands round the buring inferno that was once the pikey site on the rec behind the co-op...yes maybe they do deserve some time off....But so do I!

Anyway todays half-term activity is going to Primark and H&M to find mummy some shiney things....The girls love it...Its liek a tresure hunt..you can see the glee in their faces as i prise the Ds's out of their clammy hands an say ''come on get dressed''  I may partake in some shoe buying too...I have seen some lush bots in TK Max...they are £60 BUT in my defence they WERE £160....thus I am actually doing everyone a favour buying them...Me: Im saving money an keeping my feet warm in the event of the impending snow thats been forcast TK MAX: cause my money goes towards paying their ''over enthusiastic'' staff members [what is it with them!!? they stand there looking like theyre being forced to work while their family an loved ones are being held at gunpoint in the back warehouse??] so they get to drink wine and last but not least it pleases Baby Jesus: Cause he smiles when i'm happy an shoes make me happy....OoOO on the subject of TK Maxx i bought a LUSH umbrella from there last Monday.... Look

 i love rainbow things...My Husband once told me i look like a paint box exploded :) but If you can rock the look then you shoudl go for it :)


Anyway Im bored now as im sur eyou guy's are...(if anyone even reads this) and there appears to be a weird ritualistic drowning occuring in the bathroom...*sigh* so I better go save whichever one of my children is being murdered by the other an set off to buy some more soap and glory [as my darling angels decided to create their own range of cosmetics using my expensive ones and the toilet bowl as a mixing pot!!)...

I bod you adieo

Half  Term....**SIGH**